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Vampire Slayer - THE VAMPIRES WON!! - 121 to 150
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Mrsham
I lost my toes in a game of blackjack
Mon 7th May '07 3:09PM
505 Posts
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Member Since
5th Jan '07


You're all mean. See me wield my sulking at you.



STAKE HER UNTIL SHE BE DEAD!!! LISTEN NOT TO HER PITEOUS CRIES, THRICE CURS-ED QUEEN OF THE DAMNED THAT SHE BE!!

WHAT DO YOU MEAN MY EYE IS TWITCHING
 

Kelly*
Poke me in the knees and call me Roger
Mon 7th May '07 7:10PM
758 Posts
Kelly's Avatar
Member Since
4th Oct '03


Mrsham was bold enough to comment:


WHAT DO YOU MEAN MY EYE IS TWITCHING



Twitching? That's not twitching, that's combustion resulting from exposure to sunlight! Stake him! Down with Mrsham!
   

Emo Squid
sanctus, sanctus, sanctus
Tue 8th May '07 10:10AM
624 Posts
Emo Squid's Avatar
Member Since
23rd Feb '07
I'm back!

Are there 4 vamps now?! That's quite scary.

How many more innocents must die? This has gon on long enough.....

DEATH TO KELLY!!!!!!!

Diziet
optical moose
Tue 8th May '07 10:57AM
2522 Posts
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Member Since
20th Jul '05
Sister Bloodfang is a danger to us all.

stake her before the evil spreads!

Agentgonzo
There's no pee in catheter!
Tue 8th May '07 11:08AM
811 Posts
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Member Since
8th Aug '06
Kill the evil sister bloodfang before she hunts us all down and adds us to her gang of leather-clad night-fiends that roam the night.

Has anyone seen Malcolm lately?
  

Diziet
optical moose
Tue 8th May '07 2:07PM
2522 Posts
Diziet's Avatar
Member Since
20th Jul '05


Agentgonzo was bold enough to comment:

Has anyone seen Malcolm lately?



maybe he's become the latest victim of The Queen Of Darkness. we should keep an eye out tonight for signs of raising from the graveage!

Malcolm*
My ape goosed a Bishop. Who are you?
Tue 8th May '07 2:47PM
1673 Posts
Malcolm's Avatar
Member Since
3rd Jun '03


Diziet was bold enough to comment:


Agentgonzo was bold enough to comment:

Has anyone seen Malcolm lately?



maybe he's become the latest victim of The Queen Of Darkness. we should keep an eye out tonight for signs of raising from the graveage!



Thank you, comrades in the eternal struggle, for your concern. But never fear, I am still here... just. I beg you to heed my plea of about 8 posts ago, and safe me from this house of terrors!
   

Diziet
optical moose
Tue 8th May '07 2:51PM
2522 Posts
Diziet's Avatar
Member Since
20th Jul '05


Malcolm was bold enough to comment:

I beg you to heed my plea of about 8 posts ago, and safe me from this house of terrors!



the only answer at the moment is to build yourself a garlic helmet and wear it at all times. unless, that is, you have something against garlic?

edit: apparently strathclyde fire service will fit a smoke alarm in your house for free!

Malcolm*
My ape goosed a Bishop. Who are you?
Tue 8th May '07 3:33PM
1673 Posts
Malcolm's Avatar
Member Since
3rd Jun '03
Right, I have a plan. I'm making lasagne tonight for when Kelly gets home. I'm going to lace it with garlic and see what happens! I shall report back tomorrow.
   

Agentgonzo
There's no pee in catheter!
Tue 8th May '07 3:45PM
811 Posts
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Member Since
8th Aug '06


Malcolm was bold enough to comment:
Right, I have a plan. I'm making lasagne tonight for when Kelly gets home. I'm going to lace it with garlic and see what happens! I shall report back tomorrow.


Tomorrow? That could be too late. She could have turned me into a vampire by then. Pelt her with garlic bulbs as soon as she gets in through the door, and then report back to us immediately.
  

Diziet
optical moose
Tue 8th May '07 3:53PM
2522 Posts
Diziet's Avatar
Member Since
20th Jul '05


Agentgonzo was bold enough to comment:

Pelt her with garlic bulbs as soon as she gets in through the door, and then report back to us immediately.



or you could try inviting Mrsham's Garlic Nan round for dinner.


Swoop*
CHIMPO
Wed 9th May '07 1:17PM
1558 Posts
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Member Since
9th Apr '03
Well, since earlier methods of detection seemed to be slightly less than accurate, I'm embarking on a new research technique.

Avatar analysis!

I'm not sure what's going on in Diziet's pic, but there seems to be a man with a rabbit in a top hat. More Paul Daniels than Dracula.

Agentgonzo - Seems to be a robot. Always a threat to the human race I'll admit, but that can wait for another day.

Mrsham - Superman. A bit wooly, but a hero nonetheless. Besides, I'd break my stake. Have to wait for the Kryptonite stakes I've ordered from Siberia to arrive.

Emo Squid would appear to be a grainy Kenneth Brannah? I'm not sure, but I think there's mead drinking going on, so a reprieve there.

So that leaves Kelly, who for some reason, I'm sure sure what, seems to almost leap out at me as a Vamp. Call it Slayer sense if you will, but there's just something I can't quite put my finger on about her. Hmmm.

And Malcolm. Was there ever an evil Bishop in Buffy? I don't remember one. Bit of a missed opportunity there I reckon, and one which I'm certain future generations of vamps would be sure to pick up on.
Look at him, all Bishoppy and evil. Besides, we've all seen the guy, leading groups of of victims around York, wearing vintage clothes and frightening them at night down dark alleyways. That's good enough for me.

Yoink!
 

Agentgonzo
There's no pee in catheter!
Wed 9th May '07 1:26PM
811 Posts
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Member Since
8th Aug '06


Swoop was bold enough to comment:
Well, since earlier methods of detection seemed to be slightly less than accurate, I'm embarking on a new research technique.

Avatar analysis!



Whoh... sudden images of BA staking people through the heart! Even a superhero would find that a hefty whack to the chest.
  

Mrsham
I lost my toes in a game of blackjack
Wed 9th May '07 2:10PM
505 Posts
Mrsham's Avatar
Member Since
5th Jan '07


Swoop was bold enough to comment:
Emo Squid would appear to be a grainy Kenneth Brannah? I'm not sure, but I think there's mead drinking going on, so a reprieve there.



Ooh, I know! It's Treguard, the fictional host of popular early '90s kids ITV game show Knightmare. Definitely no staking for Treguard. Branagh yes, Treguard definitely not.
 

Diziet
optical moose
Wed 9th May '07 2:11PM
2522 Posts
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Member Since
20th Jul '05
there was an evil preacher type in Buffy (played by nathan fillian if memory serves).

so, has malcolm been staked? have we finally staked a vamp???

Malcolm*
My ape goosed a Bishop. Who are you?
Wed 9th May '07 2:26PM
1673 Posts
Malcolm's Avatar
Member Since
3rd Jun '03


Diziet was bold enough to comment:
there was an evil preacher type in Buffy (played by nathan fillian if memory serves).

so, has malcolm been staked? have we finally staked a vamp???



No! No, I haven't been staked! And if I had, you wouldn't have staked a vamp! Promise!
   

Mrsham
I lost my toes in a game of blackjack
Wed 9th May '07 2:41PM
505 Posts
Mrsham's Avatar
Member Since
5th Jan '07


Malcolm was bold enough to protest:
No! No, I haven't been staked! And if I had, you wouldn't have staked a vamp! Promise!



STAKE HIM TIL HE BE DEAD!!! HEED NOT HIS PITEOUS CRIES, THRICE-CURSED DUKE OF EDINBURGH OF THE DAMNED THAT HE BE!!

STAKE! STAKE! STAKE! (clap along everyone)
 

Diziet
optical moose
Wed 9th May '07 2:44PM
2522 Posts
Diziet's Avatar
Member Since
20th Jul '05


Mrsham was bold enough to comment:


Malcolm was bold enough to protest:
No! No, I haven't been staked! And if I had, you wouldn't have staked a vamp! Promise!



STAKE HIM TIL HE BE DEAD!!! HEED NOT HIS PITEOUS CRIES, THRICE-CURSED DUKE OF EDINBURGH OF THE DAMNED THAT HE BE!!

STAKE! STAKE! STAKE! (clap along everyone)



i'm clapping but i'm clapping because i'm scared.

has anyone seen Mrsham's frog pills?

Diziet
optical moose
Wed 9th May '07 2:46PM
2522 Posts
Diziet's Avatar
Member Since
20th Jul '05


Mrsham was bold enough to comment:

Ooh, I know! It's Treguard, the fictional host of popular early '90s kids ITV game show Knightmare. Definitely no staking for Treguard. Branagh yes, Treguard definitely not.



took me ages (and a clue from emo) to figure that out.

and i agree about branagh - swoop, can this be arranged?

Demian*
Oh Lordy, Plegaleggole
Wed 9th May '07 2:52PM
4678 Posts
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Member Since
7th Apr '03
Come along Malcolm, it's no use protesting your innocence now. Up to the oche you go...




Wait for it...



SQUELCH!



Oh No! Another scooby bites the dust! The humans are running out fast!



Agentgonzo
Amanshu - STAKED, HUMAN!
Clara - STAKED, HUMAN!
Diziet
Emo Squid
Kelly
Malcolm - STAKED, HUMAN!
Mrsham
Spanners - STAKED, HUMAN!
Swoop

Well, at this point the vampires do not yet outnumber the remaining living humans, but I can reveal it's getting pretty damn close!

NIGHT TIME! Vamps - PM me with your next choice of victim!
  

Emo Squid
sanctus, sanctus, sanctus
Wed 9th May '07 3:31PM
624 Posts
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Member Since
23rd Feb '07


*'Nightmare on Elm Street'-style dreams about Kelly*

Diziet
optical moose
Wed 9th May '07 3:48PM
2522 Posts
Diziet's Avatar
Member Since
20th Jul '05
damn, sorry malcolm. i'm beginning to think there are no vampires....

....except for The Mistress Of Ultimate Darkness!!!!!

Mrsham
I lost my toes in a game of blackjack
Wed 9th May '07 3:58PM
505 Posts
Mrsham's Avatar
Member Since
5th Jan '07
*Mrsham winces and mutters "Nassty" like Treguard, giggles a bit in a very worrying way, then keels over in a dead faint*
 

Agentgonzo
There's no pee in catheter!
Wed 9th May '07 4:11PM
811 Posts
Agentgonzo's Avatar
Member Since
8th Aug '06


Demian was bold enough to comment:

Well, at this point the vampires do not yet outnumber the remaining living humans, but I can reveal it's getting pretty damn close!


Eeek! this is getting scary now!
Grabs teddy bear and hides under the bed shivering and wrapped in a duvet.
  

Malcolm*
My ape goosed a Bishop. Who are you?
Wed 9th May '07 7:03PM
1673 Posts
Malcolm's Avatar
Member Since
3rd Jun '03
My god! I told you it wasn't me! Get Kelly, I said, for all our sakes! But no, you didn't listen, did you? And now you've left me, dead, in a house with an almost certain vampire! (OK, I admit that these two objections do cancel each other out to some extent, but still, I think you understand my point.)

Well, don't come crying to ME when you're all DEAD because KELLY has KILLED you ALL. Because I won't be listening. Because I'll be DEAD. Because you all KILLED me.

You arses.

   

Diziet
optical moose
Wed 9th May '07 7:08PM
2522 Posts
Diziet's Avatar
Member Since
20th Jul '05


Malcolm was bold enough to comment:

You arses.




by the tentacles of shoggoth, he's ranting from beyond the grave! someone stick a jammy dodger in his mouth quick!!!

ps - sorry we killed you malc

Demian*
Oh Lordy, Plegaleggole
Wed 9th May '07 8:13PM
4678 Posts
Demian's Avatar
Member Since
7th Apr '03
Aaaaaaand with a final bite of Mrsham's juicy veins, Agengonzo tips the odds in favour of the vamps!

Run away, scoobies, while you still can - the town has been overrun!

Absolutely brilliant play by all the vampires, in fact not one of you raised the town's suspicions! Well, not enough to get staked, anyway. Though I thought Agentgonzo was going down for a minute there, but Clara stepped in to take the stake instead at the last minute

I'm sure you'll be interested to know who the vamps really were all along... the first to go was the Head Vampire, Agentgonzo, who has been dead the entire game! Superbly well played, sir!

On the first night, he was successful in turning Vampire number 2, Emo Squid, to his evil cause.

The second night's attack on Diziet failed, leaving Diziet none the wiser until...

The third night, when another attempt at Diziet's throat was successful. That brings us to Day 4, the final tragic dustingsquelching of Malcolm, and a joint decision by all three vampires that Mrsham was up for the kill next as Kelly was surely going to be the next one staked (in fact, aside from the Slayer himself, Kelly was the only remaining innocent by the end of the game! You go girl!)

Anyway, fate revealed another success (you guys did get quite lucky with the coin flips throughout, it has to be said), Mrsham was converted, and the scoobies were outnumbered 4 to 2!

FINAL TOTAL

VAMPIRES
Agentgonzo
Emo Squid
Diziet
Mrsham

INNOCENTS STAKED
Amanshu
Clara
Spanners
Malcolm

SURVIVORS
Kelly
Swoop

Well played everyone! This was hilarious to watch unfold (if you don't believe me, reread the thread while knowing who the vamps actually were ). I think it's mostly down to the incredible lying, bluffing and acting indignant skills of the vamps that Swoop got so unlucky with Mrs Pointy.

Well that's it for now, please leave any comments as to how you thought it went. There'll be a good long break after this but in a month or two I might run another one with slightly more advanced rules if there's enough interest.

  

Diziet
optical moose
Wed 9th May '07 8:19PM
2522 Posts
Diziet's Avatar
Member Since
20th Jul '05
to enhance my evilness as a vampire i'm currently listening to Never Let Her Slip Away by Andrew Gold. MWA-HA-HA-HA

that was a brilliant game dem. we should have more players next time.


Mrsham
I lost my toes in a game of blackjack
Wed 9th May '07 10:38PM
505 Posts
Mrsham's Avatar
Member Since
5th Jan '07
All I can say is - brilliantly well done fellas Agentgonzo held on marvellously as the original vamp (I'd stopped suspecting him by the end, although I'm glad I salvage a little dignity by at least speculating on that piece of hidden irony, for such it proved to be)

Diz and Emo - I feel personally betrayed - excellent work!

So all in all I'm glad to be on the winning side at the end - GO VAMPIRES!

Demian - superb game, thoroughly enjoyed it from start to finish although I did pretty much suck from start to finish as well. Oh yes, and about that avatar change hmm?
 

Amanshu*
Giggity Giggity goo
Wed 9th May '07 11:51PM
2708 Posts
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Member Since
25th Aug '04
Hmmm... If I was alive at this point I'd be going "I told you! Right from the outset I said it was him, but you didn't listen. Noooo, you decided to stake me instead. How could you? You bastards? I was right but no one believed me."

But I was dead on the first day, so I won't be saying any of that. So there.

(Also yay! Another game! I want to plaaaaaaaay).
   

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