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10 Worst Evolutionary Designs - 1 to 8
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Demian*
Oh Lordy, Plegaleggole
Thu 30th Jul '09 9:53AM
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7th Apr '03
(from wired.com)

1 Sea mammal blowhole. Any animal that spends appreciable time in the ocean should be able to extract oxygen from water via gills. Enlarging the lungs and moving a nostril to the back of the head is a poor work-around.

2 Hyena clitoris. When engorged, this "pseudopenis," which doubles as the birth canal, becomes so hard it can crush babies to death during exit.

3 Kangaroo teat. In order to nurse, the just-born joey, a frail and squishy jellybean, must clamber up Mom's torso and into her pouch for a nipple.

4 Giraffe birth canal. Mama giraffes stand up while giving birth, so baby's entry into the world is a 5-foot drop. Wheeee! Crack.

5 Goliath bird-eating spider exoskeleton. This giant spider can climb trees to hunt very mobile prey. Yet it has a shell so fragile it practically explodes when it falls? Well, at least it can produce silk to make a sail. Oh, wait it can't!

6 Shark-fetus teeth. A few shark species have live births (instead of laying eggs). The Jaws juniors grow teeth in the womb. The first sibling or two to mature sometimes eat their siblings in utero. Mmm ... siblings.

7 Human stomach. People can digest a lot except for cellulose, the primary component of plant matter. Why don't we have commensal bacteria in our guts to do it? They're busy helping termites.

8 Slug genitalia. Some hermaphroditic species breed by wrapping their sex organs around each other. If one of said members gets stuck, the slug simply chews it off. What. The. Hell?

9 Quadrupeds. Let's say you're a four-footed animal. Now let's say you get a wound on your back, or an itch, or a bug wandering up there. Tough luck, kid. You probably can't do much about it. Hope there's a low branch around.

10 Narwhal tusk. The unicorn-like protuberance on a male narwhal's head is actually a tooth that erupts through the front of the jaw and keeps on growing, up to 9 feet. Narwhal: "Doc, I have a toothache." Dentist: "Indeed."
  

Xander
The panda is the evolutionary equivalent of living off benefits.
Thu 30th Jul '09 11:01PM
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16th Jul '08
No mention of the Panda! Now that's a creature that is a terrible evolutionary design. What did nature think let's evolve an entirely nialistic animal.

Actually the Panda isn't even nialistic that's far too complex it's just lazy. Doesn't want to reproduce doesn't like it's own young... Don't get me started. What did evolution think when it looked at the Panda "I know let's wait for the humans to take care of it". The panda is the evolutionary equivalent of living off benefits.

I've said it before and I'll say it again the Panda is just not trying.
 

Gertrude
Landy Dirtlady
Sun 2nd Aug '09 5:38PM
579 Posts
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12th Oct '05


Demian was bold enough to comment:

10 Narwhal tusk. The unicorn-like protuberance on a male narwhal's head is actually a tooth that erupts through the front of the jaw and keeps on growing, up to 9 feet. Narwhal: "Doc, I have a toothache." Dentist: "Indeed."



I had a tooth that was on course to pop out just under my nose. Does that make me a narwhal? I would have looked a lot like this, were it not for the wonder of orthodontics.

 

Afghan hound
Trainee Daddy
Mon 3rd Aug '09 5:59PM
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3rd Aug '08
i reckon the human waste disposal system needs completely rethinking.

instead of excreting smelly fecal matter at least once a day why can't we just break down the waste and emit it through our skin as some kind of fragrant gas that actually helps to repair the ozone layer? why, i ask you, why??
 

Amanshu*
Giggity Giggity goo
Fri 7th Aug '09 1:40PM
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25th Aug '04


Xander was bold enough to comment:
Actually the Panda isn't even nialistic that's far too complex it's just lazy.



That's a little unfair, it's not lazy, it's just too slow to catch any prey so it's forced to eat bamboo which it's stomach can't digest very well because it's a carnivore.

Of course a creature that hasn't evolved to digest it's main source of food very well isn't exactly the evolutionary peak...
   

Demian*
Oh Lordy, Plegaleggole
Sat 8th Aug '09 7:55AM
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7th Apr '03


Amanshu was bold enough to comment:


That's a little unfair, it's not lazy, it's just too slow to catch any prey so it's forced to eat bamboo which it's stomach can't digest very well because it's a carnivore.

Of course a creature that hasn't evolved to digest it's main source of food very well isn't exactly the evolutionary peak...



I'm not sure you appreciate the full extent of Xander's feelings towards the panda...
http://forum.thedaddy.org/view_thread.html?ref_id=12513&start=30

  

General*
Windows Bob - the best!
Sat 8th Aug '09 11:43AM
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7th Apr '03
I'm with you on the panda.

I'm pretty sure it could be used on some kind of theory that evolution sometimes goes in reverse!
    

Xander
The panda is the evolutionary equivalent of living off benefits.
Wed 12th Aug '09 5:11PM
169 Posts
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16th Jul '08
The damn Pandas were on the news the other day as a last news item about how the zoo in China is getting the lady Panda to fancy the boy Panda. Now that's an evolutionary disaster needing another species to help you get a stiffy. Those Panda's are laughting at us.
 

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